What You Missed at L.A.'s Fashion Week!
O Penn
This was perhaps the most serious event to hit Los Angeles this
year. The yearlong impact of this event is so significant that
this convention lasts an entire week. Powerful people from
numerous sectors of the glamour industry flocked to L.A. to
submerge themselves as deeply as possible into this gathering,
because what was revealed will have worldwide significance over
the next year. It was Fashion Week and knowing every detail of
what unfolded over the past week determines heavily whether you
are hot or left out in 2006.
This is definitely no laughing matter. Scoff if you must, but do
cover your mouth if you do so. Normalcy is a sickness here.
Events of this nature are reserved for very special people only.
Here is recap for those who missed out last week.
Dark colors did permeate the landscape of the designers this
week as a tribute to the remainder of the world outside of the
scope of the fashion industry.
Coiffeurs and coiffeuses paid rapt attention to ensure that they
know the right do to do this year. Such an error could drop a
hairstylist from the rank of $250 a cut to being on the waiting
list for a job at Super Cuts™, dropping status faster than a
2006 Bugatti Veyron 16.4 accelerates from zero to 60 mph (2.5
seconds). This year it is more complex than usual, as both long
and short styles are in. Stylist will be out on the proverbial
limb because patrons will have to decide for themselves. Not
good.
The iPod® has really arrived this year. It has been glamorously
accessorized with a jeweled holster. Those caught promenading
around without the holster will be classified "Wal-Mart' by
those in the know.
Paris Hilton brought an entourage with notebooks and
walkie-talkies to ensure that she captures every minute detail.
Can you imagine being seen in boot-cut, $500 blue jeans when the
appropriate call this year is a pair of straight legs?
For those seeking to be mistaken for six-foot, 110- pound
fashion models, leggings are the fashion statement of 2006. It
is rumored that this began when NBA star Kobe Bryant began
wearing tights below his shorts during ballgames.
Speaking of professional sports, a special section for wives and
girlfriends of professional athletes has been established to
allow the nouveau rich a "training period' to transition
themselves to matriculating with the vapid veterans of
superficiality. A similar section was set up for the spouses and
girlfriends of "gangsta" rappers but was dropped due to numerous
noteworthy complaints being registered by the gals. Echoes of
"Excuse me!" and "Oh no you don't!" were heard aplenty. So, the
idea was dropped immediately to avoid further problems.
Bebe recruited Oscar®-nominated costume designer and Madonna's
stylist Arianne Phillips to breath new life into an article of
clothing that has been around at least since the 1800s.
Fashion designer Cardona introduced basic clothes that were
predominantly black and gray with traffic-light reds and Concord
grape. Collections from Bebe, David Meister, Juan Carlos Obando,
Louis Verdad and Kara Saun followed suit.
Many offerings resembled clothes readily found in JCPenneys or
Sears with one minor difference. These clothes are very, very
expensive, and despite being nothing more than clothes seen for
years, these clothes are being called "innovative." Of course,
this is being said by the same folk people who are selling these
clothes, but they would not say if it just to say it.
It is truly amazing how the fashion business steadily takes
numerous concepts or fashion statements that originally stem
from poor people immersed in abject poverty and transform those
into clothes nobody but the very rich can afford.
With all the problems this world faces it is good to have a
place for rich people to gather and worry about their clothes
and appearance. Lord knows that this is important. It must be
great to live in a bubble that prevents you from thinking or
worrying about anything more serious than how you are going to
look when you go out at night.
I am not sure how practical any of these designers' self-serving
fashion statements would fit into everyday life. But if you are
looking for something shamelessly expensive to wear on Halloween
that will make you look like a Picasso abstract, a plethora of
options are available.
You will be playing catch-up for the entire year if you missed
this year's Fashion Week!
About the author:
O Penn is a frustrated copywriter who is fed up with businesses
that pay nominally and demand excessively. Make a worthwhile
fashion statement. Buy something from
passionately.
This was perhaps the most serious event to hit Los Angeles this
year. The yearlong impact of this event is so significant that
this convention lasts an entire week. Powerful people from
numerous sectors of the glamour industry flocked to L.A. to
submerge themselves as deeply as possible into this gathering,
because what was revealed will have worldwide significance over
the next year. It was Fashion Week and knowing every detail of
what unfolded over the past week determines heavily whether you
are hot or left out in 2006.
This is definitely no laughing matter. Scoff if you must, but do
cover your mouth if you do so. Normalcy is a sickness here.
Events of this nature are reserved for very special people only.
Here is recap for those who missed out last week.
Dark colors did permeate the landscape of the designers this
week as a tribute to the remainder of the world outside of the
scope of the fashion industry.
Coiffeurs and coiffeuses paid rapt attention to ensure that they
know the right do to do this year. Such an error could drop a
hairstylist from the rank of $250 a cut to being on the waiting
list for a job at Super Cuts™, dropping status faster than a
2006 Bugatti Veyron 16.4 accelerates from zero to 60 mph (2.5
seconds). This year it is more complex than usual, as both long
and short styles are in. Stylist will be out on the proverbial
limb because patrons will have to decide for themselves. Not
good.
The iPod® has really arrived this year. It has been glamorously
accessorized with a jeweled holster. Those caught promenading
around without the holster will be classified "Wal-Mart' by
those in the know.
Paris Hilton brought an entourage with notebooks and
walkie-talkies to ensure that she captures every minute detail.
Can you imagine being seen in boot-cut, $500 blue jeans when the
appropriate call this year is a pair of straight legs?
For those seeking to be mistaken for six-foot, 110- pound
fashion models, leggings are the fashion statement of 2006. It
is rumored that this began when NBA star Kobe Bryant began
wearing tights below his shorts during ballgames.
Speaking of professional sports, a special section for wives and
girlfriends of professional athletes has been established to
allow the nouveau rich a "training period' to transition
themselves to matriculating with the vapid veterans of
superficiality. A similar section was set up for the spouses and
girlfriends of "gangsta" rappers but was dropped due to numerous
noteworthy complaints being registered by the gals. Echoes of
"Excuse me!" and "Oh no you don't!" were heard aplenty. So, the
idea was dropped immediately to avoid further problems.
Bebe recruited Oscar®-nominated costume designer and Madonna's
stylist Arianne Phillips to breath new life into an article of
clothing that has been around at least since the 1800s.
Fashion designer Cardona introduced basic clothes that were
predominantly black and gray with traffic-light reds and Concord
grape. Collections from Bebe, David Meister, Juan Carlos Obando,
Louis Verdad and Kara Saun followed suit.
Many offerings resembled clothes readily found in JCPenneys or
Sears with one minor difference. These clothes are very, very
expensive, and despite being nothing more than clothes seen for
years, these clothes are being called "innovative." Of course,
this is being said by the same folk people who are selling these
clothes, but they would not say if it just to say it.
It is truly amazing how the fashion business steadily takes
numerous concepts or fashion statements that originally stem
from poor people immersed in abject poverty and transform those
into clothes nobody but the very rich can afford.
With all the problems this world faces it is good to have a
place for rich people to gather and worry about their clothes
and appearance. Lord knows that this is important. It must be
great to live in a bubble that prevents you from thinking or
worrying about anything more serious than how you are going to
look when you go out at night.
I am not sure how practical any of these designers' self-serving
fashion statements would fit into everyday life. But if you are
looking for something shamelessly expensive to wear on Halloween
that will make you look like a Picasso abstract, a plethora of
options are available.
You will be playing catch-up for the entire year if you missed
this year's Fashion Week!
About the author:
O Penn is a frustrated copywriter who is fed up with businesses
that pay nominally and demand excessively. Make a worthwhile
fashion statement. Buy something from
passionately.
posted by The Editor at
4:56 AM
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